What a 40-Year Gardener at Allan Gardens Conservatory Taught Me About Presence, Film Photography, and Letting Go
The Queen of the Night Only Blooms for 24 Hours. Here's How I Finally Saw Her.
I'd been visiting Allan Gardens Conservatory every week for 52 weeks for this project, and I'd visited before I started and have continued to visit since. Somewhere along the way it stopped feeling like a location and started feeling like a place in which I immersed myself. It became my muse.
Tuesday was one of those visits that reminded me why.
I went to meet with Matt, the Executive Director of Friends of Allan Gardens, to talk about the exhibition and how we might collaborate. It was a meaningful conversation and I appreciated how he took care looking through my photographs. It feels apt that he would be one of the first people outside of my immediate circle to actually see the prints.
After the meeting, I couldn't leave.
I brought my film camera again because it’s impossible to leave that space without observing the beauty that lives there.
And on the way back into the Palm House, I ran into George.
George is someone I met during the project. He always offered me a wealth of fascinating information. Warm as always we reconnected and he shared that on Thursday he would celebrate his 40-year anniversary working at gardens around the city, and it would be his 20th anniversary at Allan Gardens Conservatory specifically.
I reminded him of how he had surprised me with information about the Queen of the Night’s life cycle. He was the one who told me that she only blooms for 24 hours. And looking back at the archive I had only ever photographed her when she was closed.
He pulled out his phone and proudly showed me photos of her in full bloom. She was extraordinary. He would let me photograph him at all. He said he doesn't want to leave memories behind, and I had to respect that. So I was content to photograph of his screen. For now, it was the closest I was ever going to get the Queen of the Night in full bloom and I wanted to show you.
Such a generous soul, he told me so many more things about the Queen of the Night like the fact this plant bears dragon fruit. The plant needs bats to pollinate it, and since there are no bats in the building, the gardeners do it themselves with a Q-tip. Although the success rate is super low, they managed to grow one and he showed me a photo of that too.
I wasn't sure how he'd managed to see the Queen of the Night in bloom since the Conservatory closes at 5pm. He explained that she was still open when he arrived at 7am. I just love that. He showed up, and she was still there waiting.
I've been thinking about George ever since. Here I am, a photographer who spent a year making images so that moments don't disappear. And the film taught me so much more. It taught me to stop chasing moments, to just be present, and to see, really see beyond looking, not paying attention to digital feedback.
And George, who has spent 40 years tending to living things, wants no record of himself at all. He already knew that. We just found different ways to the same place.
In the Hours of Light is on display from May 1-31 as part of the CONTACT Photography Festival, showing across three Toronto venues. George will be at the Conservatory that morning, tending to something quietly and sharing his vast knowledge with anyone lucky enough to cross his path. Congratulations George!
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